Dean Wesley Smith first came up with the Magical Bakery idea...
...and we liked the concept. A lot.
DWS first mentioned the Magical Bakery on his website. His concept goes like this: A baker makes a pie, carves it into slices, and sells each slice of the pie until it's gone. For a writer, his/her words are the pie and the writer's stories make each slice of that pie. But the writer's bakery is a magical one, in that s/he can sell the same slice of pie over and over again. For instance, DWS ("the Deanster" to those who know him ) sold a short story to an anthology...then sold the same story to ANOTHER anthology...then sold a hold on the story to a Hollywood media outfit...and has the story to sell again and again, via Kindle or Smashwords or iBooks...and on and on.
What's the matter with the slice of pie (above), anyway? Is it BLEEDING?
You don't have to be a writer to start your own Magical Bakery. An artist selling glicées is doing the same thing. A photographer selling prints or stock images is doing the same thing. Make and sell t-shirts, you're doing it, too. We've gotta tell you, it's a nice business to have, this Magical Bakery. You might consider opening one of your own.
Inspired by DWS, we're opening our own M. Bakery. And, absolutely, this is the place where we hype our own stuff and hope that someone, someday, buys something. Not for the money -- this is the day-old Magical Bakery, where we discount goods whenever we can -- but because we want people to read our stories.
DWS first mentioned the Magical Bakery on his website. His concept goes like this: A baker makes a pie, carves it into slices, and sells each slice of the pie until it's gone. For a writer, his/her words are the pie and the writer's stories make each slice of that pie. But the writer's bakery is a magical one, in that s/he can sell the same slice of pie over and over again. For instance, DWS ("the Deanster" to those who know him ) sold a short story to an anthology...then sold the same story to ANOTHER anthology...then sold a hold on the story to a Hollywood media outfit...and has the story to sell again and again, via Kindle or Smashwords or iBooks...and on and on.
What's the matter with the slice of pie (above), anyway? Is it BLEEDING?
You don't have to be a writer to start your own Magical Bakery. An artist selling glicées is doing the same thing. A photographer selling prints or stock images is doing the same thing. Make and sell t-shirts, you're doing it, too. We've gotta tell you, it's a nice business to have, this Magical Bakery. You might consider opening one of your own.
Inspired by DWS, we're opening our own M. Bakery. And, absolutely, this is the place where we hype our own stuff and hope that someone, someday, buys something. Not for the money -- this is the day-old Magical Bakery, where we discount goods whenever we can -- but because we want people to read our stories.
And the name of our bakery?
HMP logo designed by Matthew Turner.
Our latest HMP release is...
...hey, if we've gotta tell you the title, it's pretty obvious you're not our target audience. So who IS the target audience? People who can read.
When we decided to write a story featuring a sexy woman on the cover, we remembered Frankie. We'd played with this project, once upon a time, but didn't know to place it. There just weren't too many options available for longer-than-short fiction but not-a-novel Frankenstein stories. It's a new world out there in the electronic jungle, though, so we pulled out the tale, realized it needed a great deal of polishing, and started polishing it. A few weeks later, with ALL kinds of changes, we had our first electronic chapbook.
What really made us happy? We think it works.
Like most works of fiction, FPI all started with What If? In this case, we thought to ourselves, “What if Frankenstein’s monster decided to become a private detective?” We're not talking about Mary Shelley’s creation, not at all. Her version of the monster is intelligent, caring, and well-spoken. We wanted a growling, brain dead, green-skinned, flesh-craving monster who, for some reason, fancied himself as Magnum, P.I.
Since Frankie lacks “a single functioning brain cell” and grunts instead of talks, we gave him a female sidekick. Friday is gorgeous and corrupt, views Charlie’s Angels as her personal televised guidebook on crime-solving, and values beauty more than a bit too much. She’s smarter than her boss, but barely, and respects his detecting skills...which don't exist.
Finally, we have our heroes share a building with the world’s most fantastic detective (sorry: the World’s Most Fantastic Detective™), added in a series of murders, mixed well, and had a wonderful time. If you decide to give it a go, we hope you'll like it, too.
When we decided to write a story featuring a sexy woman on the cover, we remembered Frankie. We'd played with this project, once upon a time, but didn't know to place it. There just weren't too many options available for longer-than-short fiction but not-a-novel Frankenstein stories. It's a new world out there in the electronic jungle, though, so we pulled out the tale, realized it needed a great deal of polishing, and started polishing it. A few weeks later, with ALL kinds of changes, we had our first electronic chapbook.
What really made us happy? We think it works.
Like most works of fiction, FPI all started with What If? In this case, we thought to ourselves, “What if Frankenstein’s monster decided to become a private detective?” We're not talking about Mary Shelley’s creation, not at all. Her version of the monster is intelligent, caring, and well-spoken. We wanted a growling, brain dead, green-skinned, flesh-craving monster who, for some reason, fancied himself as Magnum, P.I.
Since Frankie lacks “a single functioning brain cell” and grunts instead of talks, we gave him a female sidekick. Friday is gorgeous and corrupt, views Charlie’s Angels as her personal televised guidebook on crime-solving, and values beauty more than a bit too much. She’s smarter than her boss, but barely, and respects his detecting skills...which don't exist.
Finally, we have our heroes share a building with the world’s most fantastic detective (sorry: the World’s Most Fantastic Detective™), added in a series of murders, mixed well, and had a wonderful time. If you decide to give it a go, we hope you'll like it, too.
Our most popular HMP release?
It's The Atheist's Daughter.
Cassandra Parkin (2011 Scott Prize winner), said this: "In the small, insular town of Ashfork, Kristin Faraday lives an isolated and penniless life with her single mother Becky – an adorable but feckless artist, who Kristin seems to end up parenting quite a lot of the time. Her adolescence has been difficult and lonely. Apart from two close friends, she feels disconnected from the rest of her peer-group, and longs to escape. Then, a group of oddly-assorted people arranged into a loose approximation of family move into town, and Kristin realises there is something sinister about them…
If you’re thinking these ingredients sound familiar, well, you’re probably not wrong. This is described by its authors (Renee Harrell being the nom du plume of a well-established writing partnership) as being “a supernatural thriller, posing as a Young Adult paranormal novel, written for a crossover audience”. The YA crossover genre is probably best known for the love-it-hate-it-please-God-make-it-stop trainwreck that was the Twilight saga, and every element I’ve mentioned above appears in Meyer’s books. Here’s why 'The Atheist’s Daughter' is orders of magnitude better." (For the rest of the review, stop by here.)
Jennifer, at Can't Put It Down, said, "Having just finished this novel, I immediately took it upstairs to my 13 year old stepdaughter and said, "You HAVE to read this!" She gave me a quizzical look and I said, "Yes, it is THAT good!"
You want to see some bad reviews? Just go to TerribleReviewsPlusWe'reSoMean.com for the full scoop.
Cassandra Parkin (2011 Scott Prize winner), said this: "In the small, insular town of Ashfork, Kristin Faraday lives an isolated and penniless life with her single mother Becky – an adorable but feckless artist, who Kristin seems to end up parenting quite a lot of the time. Her adolescence has been difficult and lonely. Apart from two close friends, she feels disconnected from the rest of her peer-group, and longs to escape. Then, a group of oddly-assorted people arranged into a loose approximation of family move into town, and Kristin realises there is something sinister about them…
If you’re thinking these ingredients sound familiar, well, you’re probably not wrong. This is described by its authors (Renee Harrell being the nom du plume of a well-established writing partnership) as being “a supernatural thriller, posing as a Young Adult paranormal novel, written for a crossover audience”. The YA crossover genre is probably best known for the love-it-hate-it-please-God-make-it-stop trainwreck that was the Twilight saga, and every element I’ve mentioned above appears in Meyer’s books. Here’s why 'The Atheist’s Daughter' is orders of magnitude better." (For the rest of the review, stop by here.)
Jennifer, at Can't Put It Down, said, "Having just finished this novel, I immediately took it upstairs to my 13 year old stepdaughter and said, "You HAVE to read this!" She gave me a quizzical look and I said, "Yes, it is THAT good!"
You want to see some bad reviews? Just go to TerribleReviewsPlusWe'reSoMean.com for the full scoop.
Our first HMP release? Since you've asked...
...it's After Things Went Bad: Three Tales of the Near Future.
This mini-anthology contains three science fiction stories (Mr. Tinker, At Home on Wintebury Circle and After Things Went Bad), freshly polished and ready to read. We think of the stories as "Before Things Went Bad", "When Things Went Bad" and "After Things Went Bad" but your mileage may vary. We hope you like 'em. At nearly 9,000 words for just 99-cents, it's worth a shot. We hope so, at least.
If you've got a buck to spare, you'll find the dig version over at Smashwords right here. If you're a Kindle kind of person, you'll find it here.
At 99-cents, it's a bargain, we tells ya. But you don't only have to take our word for it. Here's what Sarah Nicolas, of Sift Book Reviews said (in a 5-starred review): "Even more than the distinctive voices, impeccable writing, and well-wrought characters, the dark captivating atmosphere will wrap around you and linger long after you finish reading."
This mini-anthology contains three science fiction stories (Mr. Tinker, At Home on Wintebury Circle and After Things Went Bad), freshly polished and ready to read. We think of the stories as "Before Things Went Bad", "When Things Went Bad" and "After Things Went Bad" but your mileage may vary. We hope you like 'em. At nearly 9,000 words for just 99-cents, it's worth a shot. We hope so, at least.
If you've got a buck to spare, you'll find the dig version over at Smashwords right here. If you're a Kindle kind of person, you'll find it here.
At 99-cents, it's a bargain, we tells ya. But you don't only have to take our word for it. Here's what Sarah Nicolas, of Sift Book Reviews said (in a 5-starred review): "Even more than the distinctive voices, impeccable writing, and well-wrought characters, the dark captivating atmosphere will wrap around you and linger long after you finish reading."
Our second HMP release? No, we know you didn't ask...
...but it's Something Wicked.
SW is our take on Nancy Drew. It's a Young Adult thriller... with a touch of the paranormal and a little romance.
It's 240 pages for $7.99 (paperback) or $2.99 (download). Kim, The Caffeinated Diva, who gave it a "4 Mugs" Review. And Alanna Shaw said this, on The Flashlight Reader: "If you love a good mystery/ghost story, you'll enjoy this novel! Plus, there is an element of 60s rock that makes this story...well, ROCK."
Kim and Alanna? These women know their stuff.
SW is our take on Nancy Drew. It's a Young Adult thriller... with a touch of the paranormal and a little romance.
It's 240 pages for $7.99 (paperback) or $2.99 (download). Kim, The Caffeinated Diva, who gave it a "4 Mugs" Review. And Alanna Shaw said this, on The Flashlight Reader: "If you love a good mystery/ghost story, you'll enjoy this novel! Plus, there is an element of 60s rock that makes this story...well, ROCK."
Kim and Alanna? These women know their stuff.
We went ahead and made...
...our next big mistake. Yep, we decided to sell the script for an unwanted t.v. pilot.
Bill Shakespeare's Next Big Mistake: Our Television Pilot and What Happened tells the tale of ... well, our writing adventures in and out of Burbank, our would-be t.v. pilot -- and then we wrap the whole thing up with the actual teleplay for BSNBM. No one, anywhere, has reviewed this effort. Or ever will review it, we're guessing.
You'll notice we've gone with a "Turner and Turner" byline. That's because some fool talked us into "branding" our Renée Harrell name. Renée Harrell writes fiction, not teleplays.
Those fools, the Turners? They're the goofs that waste their days writing television scripts.
Suckers.
Bill Shakespeare's Next Big Mistake: Our Television Pilot and What Happened tells the tale of ... well, our writing adventures in and out of Burbank, our would-be t.v. pilot -- and then we wrap the whole thing up with the actual teleplay for BSNBM. No one, anywhere, has reviewed this effort. Or ever will review it, we're guessing.
You'll notice we've gone with a "Turner and Turner" byline. That's because some fool talked us into "branding" our Renée Harrell name. Renée Harrell writes fiction, not teleplays.
Those fools, the Turners? They're the goofs that waste their days writing television scripts.
Suckers.
In our bakery (kinda)....
Want to get WICKED?
Wicked Games (Cobblestone Press) goes like this: Kelli Harnett wasn't looking for the man of her dreams but she found him, anyway. Sexy, talented and successful, Dravon Fletcher is everything she'd wanted in a life partner. Frustratingly, he refuses to have sex with her until they've shared "all" of their secrets. One dark night, she discovers his greatest secret: Dravon is a werewolf. Under the light of a full moon, she spies upon him as he takes a werewolf bitch in heat.
Broken-hearted, Kelli flees Minnesota and tries to rebuild her life. But it isn't going to be that easy to forget her fiancée. Dravon has followed her, wanting her back. His werewolf lover wants her dead. And one of the richest men in the world has learned that Dravon Fletcher is a monster -- and has set a trap to prove it.
Here's what Missy Brown said about the story on ParaNormal Romance: "You see why Kelli cannot shake the sexy wolf man! When we get to see Draven's defense of Kelli, I cheered for the alpha male protecting his mate! Loved it!!! Great first shifter story and I would love to see what they come up with next!"
In our 20,000+ words, there's love, there's a mystery, there's werewolves, and there's definitely some bed play, but we don't get to the really sexy part until Chapter Four (of Five, with an epilogue). Our heroine, Kelli, is a little frustrated about the situation herself -- she wants to get to the really sexy part during the first few pages but Dravon, that rascal, holds back. (We love the name "Dravon" for a romance character. It seems SO romance-character that it makes us laugh.) If you want to read the first chapter -- for free -- you'll find it here.
Broken-hearted, Kelli flees Minnesota and tries to rebuild her life. But it isn't going to be that easy to forget her fiancée. Dravon has followed her, wanting her back. His werewolf lover wants her dead. And one of the richest men in the world has learned that Dravon Fletcher is a monster -- and has set a trap to prove it.
Here's what Missy Brown said about the story on ParaNormal Romance: "You see why Kelli cannot shake the sexy wolf man! When we get to see Draven's defense of Kelli, I cheered for the alpha male protecting his mate! Loved it!!! Great first shifter story and I would love to see what they come up with next!"
In our 20,000+ words, there's love, there's a mystery, there's werewolves, and there's definitely some bed play, but we don't get to the really sexy part until Chapter Four (of Five, with an epilogue). Our heroine, Kelli, is a little frustrated about the situation herself -- she wants to get to the really sexy part during the first few pages but Dravon, that rascal, holds back. (We love the name "Dravon" for a romance character. It seems SO romance-character that it makes us laugh.) If you want to read the first chapter -- for free -- you'll find it here.
